Social media, books, and that random person in the street would like you to believe that pregnancy and the postpartum phase are a magical time with ultrasounds, pregnancy announcements, and choosing a colour for the nursery. That you should cherish your pregnancy and be thankful for what your body can do, or that you’ll be floating on a pink cloud snuggling your new baby.
The reality is that for many people, pregnancy and postpartum (the first few months after birth) are fraught with anxious thoughts, difficult emotions, and transitions that feel too big to process.
Maybe some of these scenarios sound familiar:
You’re not thankful for what your body can do; you hate how uncomfortable you are, the stretch marks that have started to appear, and just want your old body back.
You’re not floating on a pink cloud, but you are crying at 3am when your baby won’t settle and wondering if you made a mistake by having a child.
You’re not living in the newborn bubble, but you are irrationally angry at your partner for something small, and you don’t know what sets off this sudden and intense anger.
All of these experiences and feelings are very common during pregnancy and the postpartum period, but unfortunately they’re not talked about enough. Many people feel alone, isolated, or like a bad parent when they are experiencing difficulties during pregnancy and after birth. I’ve been there, too. I know how the sleep deprivation strips you of all your defenses and how difficult it can be to grieve the old life you had while you feel like you should just be grateful.
Counselling is a space where you can feel supported during these big life transitions and where you can learn new strategies that help you to navigate these feelings and experiences.
If you’re pregnant, you might be experiencing:
Anxious thoughts and medical anxiety about pregnancy and birth
Depression
Difficulty processing body changes such as gaining weight, stretch marks, swelling
Having to follow a diet for medical reasons
Unwanted comments about your body
Resurfacing of issues with food or body image that you had earlier in life
Lack of boundaries from family, friends, coworkers, or loved ones
Difficulty adjusting to the uncertainty of pregnancy and birth
If you’re postpartum or have just given birth, you might be experiencing:
Overwhelm at the sudden life change
Grief about your old life
Anxious thoughts about your baby’s well-being
Resentment towards your partner, children, or other loved ones
Difficulty adjusting to your new body after the birth
Feeling low self-esteem because of a higher weight
Struggling to bond with your baby
Changes to your relationship with your partner
Feeling pressure to be a perfect parent
Processing a difficult or unexpected birth experience
Emotional and physical exhaustion
Postpartum rage or sudden bursts of anger that seem to come out of nowhere
Lacking time for self care
How I can support you
If any of the above sound familiar, I am here to support you. In our work together, we might focus on:
Learning new coping skills and emotional regulation techniques that you can use in situations where you feel anxious, stressed, sad, or angry
Determining how your basic needs (sleep or rest, alone time, nutrition, hydration, movement, relaxation) can be met in order to reduce your overwhelm, anxiety, anger, or depression
Creating a safety net that you can turn to when you are feeling overwhelmed, angry, anxious, or depressed
Creating space for moments of self care and just you
Preparing for any difficult conversations or situations and how you can navigate them in a way that isn’t detrimental to your mental health
Determining how you can set boundaries with family members, friends, and loved ones during pregnancy and postpartum
Exploring how you can follow a medically necessary diet in a way that safeguards your mental health and prevents past eating or food issues from resurfacing
Exploring any core beliefs you hold about pregnancy, motherhood, and your body that are impacting your mental health, and challenging them with core beliefs that better support your mental health
Exploring any events or relationships that have contributed to your perception of your body, pregnancy, and motherhood, and processing them together